Most people believe that mental illness means that a person has failed in looking after themselves, has a personality defect, or just isnt trying hard enough. With 1 in 4 adults suffering from a mental illness, these wrong ideas hit us pretty hard and make us feel like a failure before we even begin trying to fight our mental illness. But, science can point us in a very different direction. Studies of the brain have pointed to causes of mental illness that have nothing to do with your personality or failures. Instead, imbalances of chemicals in the brain are found to be a cause.


Image source: www.bestmastersinpsychology.com
This inforgraphic shows us why medication is sometimes a lifesaver. It can be way out of our control to cope when these chemical imbalances affect us. Medication is able to go straight to the problem and level out those imbalances making it easier for us to cope, and easier to fight your mental illness on your terms. Think of it in the way that it weakens your opponent, making it easier to land your punches effectively and win the game. Stigma says that if you rely on medication then you are not truly doing it for yourself, and you must be so weak that you can even fight your mental illness by yourself. THIS IS NOT THE CASE. Medication is a tool, and your gonna need a whole toolbox to fight mental illness. Why wouldn't you use all the tools in the toolbox to give yourself a better chance? Do not listen to society's opinions, they are so wrong. Medication can really help, so dont rob yourself from its blessing.

Research into brain chemistry has gone even further, finding that we can actually rewire our own brains, using different process'. Meaning, no matter how tired, how old or how young, we have a chance to effectively battle mental illness.

Credit: http://www.katsioulis.com/rewiring-the-brain-infographic

Our brain has connections called neural pathways. Each of these pathways is related to a habit, activity of way of thinking. I have a neural pathway for self worth. I have a neural pathway for piano playing. Everything we do has its very own pathway in our brain. When we use these pathways a lot, like when something becomes a habit, these pathways become wider and stronger.

When I was sixteen, I watched my best friends struggle with suicidal thoughts and I worried every day that they might go through with it.

RELAX (don't do it....🎤) I used to sit in positions to make myself appear slimmer. I would sit uncomfortably to avoid a roll or to avoid my thighs expanding to the size of Austria when I sit down (ya feel me?). ❤ My weight back then was my worth and if anything made me look bigger I instantly felt worthless.

She evens shares a day where she feels down because she wakes up to find a new breakout on her face, and she not only takes a close up photo of it but then explains how it brings her down, but how it wont keep her down.

So, go follow her at selfloveclubb, and get inspired to love yourself without the ideas of beauty society crams us with. Because, you are truly your own kind of beautiful, and once you realise your own self worth no one can take that away from you. 

Better yet, consider starting your own self love instagram and blogging about your very own self love journey, and challenge yourself to start loving those things you are so insecure about!

In my counselling subjects, we talk a lot about reframing certain ideas to stop them from being toxic and re-carve them into something that can be encouraging and positive. Ive started to notice that since learning about this, I have actually started doing it to myself and my own thoughts. And it has actually helped get rid of some of my toxic thoughts.

Reframing is when a counsellor takes something you say, and gives it context and a different viewpoint on it. It also stop generalisation of toxic thoughts. Here are some examples.

'I am always ugly'.

Reframing-  (Context) 'But isn't it society that is telling you that you are ugly? Isn't it advertising, music videos and fashion that tell you that the only way to being beautiful is only one way? They tell you to act, dress and behave one specific way otherwise your not considered beautiful.

Reframing- (Generalisation)- 'You feel ugly, because of societal expectations, you are not ugly'.

I want you to think of a toxic thought, right now that starts with 'I feel...'

Have you thought of one?

I feel _________

Now I want you to say to yourself-

Just because I feel ________ does not mean that that is the truth, and it does not mean that that is what I am.

Now try applying some context to your toxic thought. Why do you think you have this thought in the first place? Should you really be blaming yourself, or did it come from a situation outside of your control?

I know I feel __________ because of ____________________

You can use this for a whole bunch of toxic thoughts and feelings, and best part is the more you reframe your thoughts into a healthier way of thinking, the less they even pop up in your brain to begin with.

So I challenge you, think of a few more thoughts and fill out those blanks again.

Keep on struggling <3

Before I even say anything I want to say this-

Being thankful does not 'solve' or 'fix' ANY mental illness. You cannot tell someone with depression to just be grateful for what they have, because that does not help anything. Most people struggling with depression are actually thankful people, but they are thankful people that are struggling with chemical imbalances in their brains. I will never tell you to be thankful and it will just fix all negative thoughts. It never works like that.

But what I do want to tell you, is that specifically counting each thing your thankful for at a certain time every day can be beneficial to your emotional and mental health. Making it a habit to have a list of thankfulness, can help some to ground themselves into reality, and also helps to fight the negative demons in our heads.

What do I mean by grounding yourself?
Some mental illnesses, such as depression and anxiety, can force an individual into a stressful, overwhelming reality where everything and everyone is out to hurt or take something away. When I go into a panic attack, I know I am not thinking straight and that my mind is freaking out over some tiny thing, but I cannot stop it. I know that I am being unrealistic, but I cannot stop myself from hyperventilating and rocking back and forth. Now, in those moments doing something that grounds you, that brings you back to whats real and whats not can be the difference between having a panic attack and not having one.

So listing things you are thankful for in your life, it can be used as a distraction. Distracting your mind from focussing on what is freaking you out means you can take the first step in maybe avoiding that panic attack.

Listing what you are thankful for can untwist the generalised lies. Lies in your head such as 'Ill never be pretty', but then you are saying you are 'thankful for that new dress you bought' because you actually do feel a bit pretty in it. It means the lie changes to 'sometimes I am not pretty', but it is not 'all the time I am not pretty'. Can you see how that would help?

Finding what you are thankful for also helps keeps the negativity from taking over. It is cliche, I know, to focus on the silver lining on every dark cloud. But I am not saying that its all happiness and rainbows and sunshine, I'm saying you can keep the negativity from taking over. It is still there, and it will always be there in our lives to be honest. But if you can keep the positive thoughts, the thankful thoughts as your focus it means that at that moment, the negatives don't have control over you.

In the past I did a thankfulness challenge. For a month, every day I posted on Facebook three words, three things to be thankful for. Some days it was easy. Other days it was a lot harder. But they dont have to be big things, just simple small things.
Some days my list was: 1. rain, 2. coffee, 3. breathing.

I recommend starting a thankfulness journal. Everyday, write in three small things you are thankful for. You cannot repeat and say the same thing twice. And when you feel like the negativity and the overwhelming demons are coming, open it and read all the things you are thankful for. It will bring back happy memories, and times when you felt okay.

Sometimes all we need is a happy memory to bring us back to why we fight to have more good days than bad days.

Keep struggling <3

I ordered a smaller, portable version of the fidget cube. I have anxiety, and it often shows itself through playing with my hair, scratching cuts and bites, and nervous shaking. Can I say I loved the feel of all the buttons, and especially the top round disc (as pictured). Running my figure around and around on that and also flicking it was my absolutely favourite.

These are easy and portable, you can use it with one hand comfortably while doing something with your other hand. The most I think I will use it will be at University, during long lectures where sitting and listening is hard. This takes off your nervous energy, but also has the absolutely satisfying feeling like clicking a pen, peeling off dried glue, or even popping a pimple. In one of my sisters school classes, she has a few toxic people which all the in the same room together can be quite stressful for her. So, she is looking forward to using that then to keep her calm and able to concentrate more on the learning.

Unfortunately, for me this is impossible for me to take it to work. In my workplace environment I would be asked to many questions about what it is for, it would stick out of my pocket too much and I use both my hands most of the time. To use this idea in the shape of a pen, or something else that does not draw unwanted attention would be really great. I can imagine being on the verge of a panic attack and digging this out in public only to have people ask me questions about it would not be helpful at all.

But overall, I give it a 9/10. All the buttons are very different, and its easy to chuck in your school bag or handbag. You can buy them directly off the Australian website, https://fidgetcubes.com.au/, otherwise eBay is also quite cheap when you buy from overseas sellers.

Definitely give it a try as a positive coping strategy, it will surprise you with how it feels and how it automatically starts calming nervous energy.