One of the hardest battles we ever face is the one in our own thoughts. How we understand the world we live in, how we understand ourselves, and how we think about certain situations becomes who we are, and becomes what we struggle with. 

Anyone with a mental illness can tell you of the demons in their head constantly whispering lies, and often the lies they believe are truths. But how do you shut them up? How do you move to a place when you can get up in the morning and look in the mirror without telling yourself 'Im ugly, and no one loves me'?

This isn't going to work for everyone. I understand that. And it may not take these thoughts away. But it is a way to fight them, and a way that may be successful. But it will be hard. 

Alright, so I am going to use the line, 'I am not good enough', because this line was my demon that came out of my anxiety. I still struggle with it, but only on my very bad days and when I don't feel like fighting. Otherwise I consider it dead and gone. 

So, 'I am not good enough' was my well-traveled road. The thoughts in our brain are like different roads or pathways. The more we think them over and over, the more well-traveled they become. They also become easier to think, and easier to think more and more. That means more situations, and other thoughts begin to lead straight back to this negative thought about yourself. So the more you travel down the road, the bigger and more downhill that road becomes. Until your at the bottom in the dark, without a hope of getting out. 

But you do have hope. See, if we let our emotions control our brain activity too much we tend to squish hope and forget it is even there. But take a moment, breathe, and remember that you have gotten through all your worse days so far and this will not be the end. 

The first thing is give yourself some hope. When your negative thoughts about yourself start overwhelming you, stop and breathe. Stop and breathe a big, long breath. Then restart yourself, take a refresh and remind yourself that you have hope. You can say things like, 'I can still do some good things even though I am overwhelmed', concentrate on something positive you have done before to battle these thoughts, remember when you won against them. Tell yourself it can happen again. 

The second, and probably most important thing is interrupt and change your negative thought. This really depends on you and what your negative label is, so you're going to have to be creative with this one. But, you have to believe it. So, in my case every time I thought I wasn't good enough I told myself three things: 'Your family loves you and is proud of you, your friends look up to you, you are good enough for them'. The constant repetition of this every time I thought I wasn't good enough, changed my road. It meant I took a left off of that road before I got to the dark bottom. And the more I did it, the less I traveled the road which means I started to not think it as often and it slowly got out of my routine of self-talk. So find a simple sentence, something that you actually believe, and every time you think that negative thought interrupt it and replace it with constant repetition of your sentence. 

The third is, do not believe the label is true. When those demons start telling you how ugly you are and that no one loves you or wants you we tend to believe that its true. That our friends and family are just faking being nice to use because they have to. But as soon as we believe the label is true, we give it the power to hurt us, to give us a panic attack to stab us in the stomach or make us want to vomit. A thought is just a thought, but if you give it attention and believe its true, thats when it can deal damage against you. 

But its got to be the hardest thing out of these three things. I get that. The only reason I could start doing this is when I realised that it was not me telling myself I was not good enough. It was the world. It was society. When I watched a movie, I compared myself and thats when I would say 'You are not good enough'. I would feel society's expectations that I needed to get a job, go to university and have a plan for the rest of my life, and when I did not know what my plan was it would hit me again, 'you are not good enough'. When I realised it was society wanting me to act a certain way, I easily turned rebel and said, 'hell no you are not going to tell me what to do or how to feel. I am in control of my own life, so I am good enough because I am doing and being the person I want to be'. 

So, have a think about your negative self-talk. Are you sure it isn't society telling you the lies? Because once you realise that it's not your fault for these thoughts, thats when you can choose not to believe them. Call them out as lies. They are merely lies and they do not have to affect you. But you have to fight them. Do not give them attention and shout it into their face, 'YOU ARE LYING'. 

These three things only work if you do them constantly enough so that they become your habit. These negative labels are a habit for you to think, so it is going to take a habit to stop them. If you are going to fight them set aside 30 days, where you promise to yourself that in this month every time you think a certain negative thought, you will fight it with these three things for 30 days. Only choose one label at a time. But once you have killed one, the other ones tend to go just as quick. 

Remember, your worth fighting for. You have a place in this world that no one else can have. So be the best version of yourself you can. You have lived through all your worst days yet. 

Keep struggling <3